In part two, Robert identifies pornography as idolatry. Pornography entices us to magnify things that are essentially unreal and seek connection where there can be no reciprocation. Loving another outside of oneself is the center of marriage and pornography is the inverse of this practice. He lays out a series of steps towards freedom that people can take internally if they find themselves prostrate before pornographic idols. -Editor
In trying to further understand the challenge of pornography we note that when Israel committed adultery with those of other nations, they also invited idolatry into their culture (Ezekiel 8:10; Apocalypse Explained 650:66). Pornographers create unreal images through repetition and exaggeration. In effect, they create physically attractive idols. Their goal is to inspire adoration for their obscene symbols by making them appear attractive, real, and powerful, even god-like. But they are none of these. An obscene or idolized picture may inspire a physical reaction or sensual delights, but it cannot inspire genuine love. Love is reciprocal. An idol cannot reciprocate or respond. In reality it is dead. But evil makes it appear to be alive and lust makes it appear attainable. Prayerful reflection can cut through those appearances. When we find ourselves being strongly attracted to these fanciful gods yet blinded to what they stand for, there is no more powerful remedy than thinking of the Lord Himself and turning to Him for help. The Lord is living, and loving, and He can and will respond to any who turn to Him with love (Apocalypse Revealed 926:2).
We know from Doctrine that conjugial love is the love of one of the opposite sex. We also know that, “It is the essence of love to love others outside of oneself, to desire to be one with them, and to render them blessed from oneself” (True Christian Religion 43). The lust inspired by pornography has no other human focus than self. There is no responsive human being in the picture – no one to love outside of oneself – no one to strive to be one with – no one to try to bless. Pornography depends upon self-gratification.
We also know from Doctrine that all delights from first to last are gathered together to support conjugial love and also the love of procreating offspring (Conjugial Love 68). To seek to enjoy those precious natural delights without thought of a true partner is to distort and pervert them. It reflects no responsibility to others.
The Lord has also provided these delights to support the love of offspring as potential angels of heaven. Adoring ‘dead’ images is to turn one’s back upon this use altogether. Denying the use turns genuine delights into lust.
In yet another connection let us remember that all our experiences become stamped in our memories. They are allotted a place there according to the pleasant and delightful things that introduced them (Arcana Coelestia 3512). The human mind is designed to associate related experiences and thoughts so that it can form conclusions about them. Contrasts between good and evil thoughts can sometimes help to form valid conclusions, PROVIDED that there are not strong lusts associated with the evil that tip the balance in its favor. If an evil and lustful memory is associated with what should be a beautiful experience, the juxtaposition can distort or even destroy the pleasure of that experience. It is fairly common, perhaps all too common, to have lewd imagery pop up, when the thought is directed to beautiful and even holy loves. The mixture can lead to conjugial cold and even become profane (Conjugial Love 256).
The more we look at pornographic images the more they become fixed in our minds. Evil people love to use such repetition to seize greater influence and power. As the Writings point out, “If one lives with adulterers and harlots he soon thinks nothing of adultery” (True Christian Religion 120:2). In an age where one can hardly pass a magazine rack without being exposed to pornography, we must face up to the hellish abuse of repetition. If you are exposed often enough to a foul smell, the time will come when you no longer realize that it stinks. (Arcana Coelestia 814).
Obviously parents will want to teach their children about the dangers of pornography as well to control their exposure to it. Care should be taken regarding the language we use lest beautiful ideas and delights suffer injury through inadvertently exciting filthy thoughts (Arcana Coelestia 5055, 2466). At the same time that we seek to combat an evil, which unfortunately is all around us, we must remember that what we are trying to defend is holy ground.
One of the strongest defenses, perhaps the strongest, is our own example. There is a strong temptation to think that we adults are able to handle these things, though of course we must protect the children from exposure to them. Being adult does not automatically mean that it is okay for us to watch R rated movies. To be effective parents, we have to face up to the evil ourselves, not just to set an example, though that is important, but rather to keep ourselves from falling prey to it.
The Lord provides a step-by-step process for combating evil in the doctrine of repentance. Know evils, see them in oneself, acknowledge them, declare one’s self guilty, condemn oneself on their account, pray to the Lord for forgiveness, desist from them, and lead a new life (New Jerusalem and its Heavenly Doctrine 160-161).
Applying these steps to pornography: One, we need to know that it is evil. Two, we need to recognize that at least some of these images are in us stamped upon our memories. Three, we need to look at them and acknowledge them for what they are and their possible effect on us as well as on those we love. Four, then we need to take responsibility for their being there. In so far as we could have turned away we are guilty. At the same time we need to remember that the hells delight in calling up past evils and making us feel there is nothing we can do about them (Arcana Coelestia 741). We can do something about them because the Lord does not allow them to inundate us beyond what we can bear (Arcana Coelestia 741, 751). Five, taking a serious look at ourselves, insofar as we invited these images; we need to condemn ourselves for them. Not saying that we are condemned to hell, but admitting that we really are responsible for them. Six, knowing their impact on our spouses, our children, and in a broader sense on our neighbors and society, we need to pray to the Lord for forgiveness. In doing so we recognize that we cannot fight this battle without His Divine help. Seven, we need to desist from them. That means shutting them out of our daily life. But we also need to shun those images that have already become a destructive part of us through lust. And if we are unclear about the evil and tend to delude ourselves that it is not harmful, then that state needs to be addressed with reflection and prayer. And if we are so drawn to the evil that we despair of breaking its hold upon us, we need to remember that with sincere prayer, together with serious and determined repentance, even the lust of adultery itself can be overcome.
In Providence the Lord will guard conjugial love as the pupil of His eye. But He can only do so in response to our free choices. It is for us to allow Him to uphold conjugial love with His infinite Divine power, which is always ready to help.
Robert is a minister, going on 58 years. He has served as Pastor in Denver, Secretary of the General Church, Principal of the Bryn Athyn Elementary School, a teacher at the Academy of the New Church, the Dean of the Academy of the New Church Theological School, Pastor of the Ivyland society, Visiting Pastor to West Africa, Japan, and Korea, Interim Pastor in Kempton, Visiting Pastor to Baltimore and Visiting Pastor to Central PA. Resting (in peace?), Robert looks forward to seeing his wife again who has been in the other world going on 34 years. They have 24 grandkids and 12 great grandkids.