Sobriety as a Means to Spiritual Growth VS. Spiritual Growth as a Means to Maintain Sobriety: A Critical Look at Recovery Part 1

Using his life experience and doctrinal study Cortland has come to several thought provoking conclusions about recovery programs and spiritual growth. This week Cortland shares his background and introduces the faults he find with AA and other 12 step programs, and next week will share more about his personal experience with these programs. -Editor.

I would like to start this essay by stating that it took much longer than needed to complete it. I have been stabbed six times, set myself on fire, my mother committed suicide, and I suffered from alcohol addiction for many years, along with a number of other instances of trial and tribulation, and I have no problem writing about any of it with two exceptions. One is that of dealing with the aftermath of being stabbed. The other is that of my experiences with recovery programs and institutions. The reason why I have difficulty writing on this subject is that there is a lot of contempt and animosity for individuals who are considered experts on the subject of recovery along with certain of their beliefs about the recovery process. I do not wish to put forth a scathing account of my experiences because that would be useless, as well as contrary to doctrine. All I can do is look to the Lord and pray that he tempers my hostility (a hostility which has grown over my years of recovery).

When did I first come to the realization that I had a problem with alcohol? When I realized that I like the feeling of being intoxicated better than how it felt to be sober.

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We Are Only As Sick As Our Secrets

Drugs, alcohol, and the following mental illness went hand in hand with religion and spiritual experiences for Dave. As he worked on moving away from one he moved closer to the other. But the conflict between the two and lack of resolution on either front led to further conflict. Ultimately he has found change in the 12 steps program of AA and the ideas of regeneration, as we read in his article for this week. -Editor.

I found myself deceiving others about the double life I led. Drugs and alcohol were a large part and they led to all kinds of horrible behavior. This resulted in spiritual and mental insanity.

I believe a large part of the insanity was because I was violating deeply held moral beliefs that I held for myself. But I was trapped in a cycle of addiction that I couldn’t break free of.

From time to time, I would resolve to stop putting the chemicals into my system and detox on my own. At some point shortly following that, I would ‘confess’ my secrets to an inappropriate person and I would be thrown into spiritual upheaval.

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